Joshuaink

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Ski-Gliding the Eiger

I am so glad I can say on my blog…

... Holy fucking crap sticks; that is fucking awesome… and I mean awesome in the proper sense!

Hat tip

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Flowery templates

Thanks to some help and nudging from a certain front-end developer (whose name you can discover on the download site), The Bus Full of Hippies templates are now free for use under a Creative Commons release.

Hmmmm, flowers!

http://busfullofhippies.johnoxton.co.uk/

Monday, November 20, 2006

What’s up with my RSS feed

Since moving to Expression Engine my RSS feed seems to be screwed. None of the HTML mark-up seems to get added, particularly the <p> tags. Anyone got any clues why that might be?

Amazon.co.uk your customer service sucks

My conversation ended this way with the nice man from Amazon.co.uk.

"You know Amazon customer service sucks," I said. "No really, it is quite shocking how bad it is."

"Is there anything else I can help you with?" he said.

"Yes," I said "your customer services!"

He laughed, I hung up... he was a nice fellow, just paying the bills, I am sure.

It all started back in October with the purchase of a digital photo frame; a try out to see if it would be a good option as a gift for a family member.

It arrived in good time, as things do from Amazon and I opened it up, hooked up my camera via the USB cable and thought, hmmm yeah that'll do just nicely.

I knew before ordering my frame that I had a spare XD memory card which I planned to donate to the cause as part of the gift. And besides I might have a frame for myself.

But the XD card didn't fit... I thought nothing of it for a day or two, I may have been tired. Then I remembered that I HAD planned to use the card with this frame, so I went back to Amazon.co.uk, checked the specs, there it was XD card was in the list... I took a screen shot... not that I don't trust big corporations or anything but y'know, they suck!

I emailed customer services told them of the error; they emailed back asking me what they wanted them to do?

I suggested that they help my find out if I have the wrong product or if the specs on the site were wrong.

Cutsomer services emailed me back and told me that they had read the specs on the site (they kindly emailed them to me) and that they were dispatching the product.

I mailed back saying NO NO NO, wait let's get this clear first.

My second digital frame duly arrived; it was the same as the first. I went back and checked the specs, XD card compatible.

I emailed customer services and suggested they, first and foremost, change the specs on the site.

Customer services emailed back and told me they would need a three days to work things out... even though the specs had changed on the site quite rapidly... why did they need a few days to sort things out I wondered? Maybe they'll be arranging a nice surprise because they value my custom.

On the end of the third day I emailed to ask how it was going... they told me they would need seven days to work things I out. I emailed customer services and told them exactly how I felt about that. Customer services emailed me back and said they needed three days to work things out.

After about the fourth day I emailed Amazon.co.uk customer services and told them that if they didn't do something within the next 24 hours I would take the matter to Trading Standards.

The next day a nice man called James called me, at around 9am, before I'd even had a coffee. We talked, I liked him, he seemed like a nice chap. Eventually he found another frame for me that took the XD card, it was £30 more than my original purchase. James left me on hold, thankfully for him it wasn't Coldplay I had to listen to, else he would have ruined my day completely and I might have ruined his right back.

The nice man called James said that the postman would be around today to pick up the unwanted frames and that he could offer me £15 of gift certificates as an apology... no further mention of the frame we had both looked at and discussed.

Now at this stage I hadn't had coffee, maybe Amazon.co.uk customer services knew that. If I had had a coffee, I might have suggested that I bought an item in good faith and that the specs had been incorrect and that THEY should sort it out; after all I had an email from Amazon.co.uk customer services saying that I was wrong and that the specs on the site were correct (specs copied into the email). I had two frames too, plenty of proof -- as it were. In other words maybe they should have just sorted it out, given me the frame that was £30 more and be done with it. But it was early so I went with the £15, hell I can buy a book or two with that I thought.

This morning, I went to buy an item on Amazon.co.uk and went to use my gift certificate, which told me I had £8.58 of credit to spend... ERRRRR?

So I called Amazon.co.uk customer services, on principal not because I need the money, and got through to a nice lady, possibly in America, possibly somewhere else. The line was bad we tried, she re-sent the email with the credit details. I entered the code the credit had already been applied, apparently.

So, I phoned back, on principal, because by this stage I am a little tired of Amazon.co.uk's customer service.

The nice man tried to tell me I had used part of my gift certificate as payment; I asked him to show me where that took place, y'know on my statement. He told me that it would happen automagically. I asked him why my Credit Card had been debited for the full amounts on all recent purchases then? The nice man put me on hold, twice... thankfully no Coldplay.

Finally, the nice man from Amazon.co.uk customer services told me that the system was showing that I had £15 credit on my account. I refreshed my browser, "still £8.58 this end," I said. "Well it's showing as £15 here," he said. So what will we do? I asked. The nice man told me to check back this evening, it should be fine.

"You know Amazon customer service sucks," I said. "No really, it is quite shocking how bad it is."

"Is there anything else I can help you with?" he said.

"Yes," I said "your customer services!"

Now, my next task is simple, I just need to find out when they might be refunding the money I am owed for the digital photo frame I bought.

Colly Contest Conclude

This post written by Carolyn Wood

If you remember, long, long ago, in Joshuaink’s distant flowery past, we began a contest: Examine Simon Collison’s site, and find the most interesting fact about him, send it in and have a chance at winning a copy of his book Beginning CSS Web Development. Great submissions from many people made this a difficult contest to judge. After all, Simon Collison, aka Colly, is an endless source of fascination for some of us, and his blog provides a wealth of scintillating tidbits about his mind, his art, his work, and his biscuits. Our judges Carolyn Wood, of Digital Web Magazine, and Colly himself, have finally decided that the winners are Sharif Ewees and Yvette.

Sharif pointed to the photo of Colly on his about page, saying, “The most interesting fact I found on the site is that the hat he’s wearing looks just like one I stole from my college roommate 5 or 6 years ago!” Colly’s comment: “I, too, stole my hat, from a Welsh girl in a pub in Wardour Street, Soho, on a cold night in 1997.” Our other winner, Yvette, says “the most interesting thing about Colly is that he makes a good-looking vampire.” Honorable mention must go to Burton Bargerstock, who pointed to Simon’s photos and wrote a lovely analysis of his work. Unfortunately, the judges were much too shallow to choose such a thoughtful response for first place. Congratulations, winners, and thanks to Apress for the prizes.

Friday, November 17, 2006

The Traveller’s Point calendar

I have just received my Traveller’s Point calendar and I am really pleased with it. The print quality is very good, the card quality is equally good and I love the fact that I can rip the pictures off and turn them into postcards (or be really selfish and stick them up in the office :D)

As I have said before, it’s a really great cause and I am not normally the charitable type but hey, you get something nice for your troubles.

Go on you know you want to

http://travellerspoint.com/buy_calendar.cfm

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Some important questions

Every time I restart my blog I always feel it’s a good time to reflect on the past, to look to the future and interact with my adoring fans and maybe get their [altered to make me sound good before republishing] opinions on things.

Over the years (no really it has now been YEARS) those questions have ranged from Am I doing okay with this? and What do you think of this design? and Am I really so lonely and fucked up that I need to seek attention in this way? To these you have mostly given the same answer, Shut the fuck up you fat beardy fuck and just get on with it will you.

But, despite your advice, a few nights ago three questions struck me, big questions too, and though I have resisted up until now, I have to ask.

You see I love custard. I mean I really fucking love custard. Nothing beats a good 20 litre bowl-full of thick, sugary custard to make my day complete.

I don’t eat custard every day but I could and would if I didn’t think all that yellow food dye would turn me into Homer Simpson.

I love custard so much that I generally send the kids to bed, without any pudding, before I will put a pan on and get some custard going. It’s even better if the Missus goes out too, so I am happy to babysit if it means a pan of custard to myself.

So my questions are:

1. Is it wrong for a 33.10 year old man to love custard as much as I do?
2. Do you love custard, or know anyone else, who loves custard as much as I do?
3. Hands up who likes the skin you get when you put custard in the fridge overnight?

Inspiration

I found the following video very inspiring. [Hat tip]

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

And so it starts all over again

There are five possible reactions I have anticipated, to the removal of the Bus full of hippies edition. They are (in no particular order):

• No-one notices due to the miracle of RSS.
• Mass hysteria on the forums of all 6 million CSS showcase sites around the world; followed by comments in the style of: well, I never really rated him anyway...grab the pitchforks, let’s burn him!
• Indifference, I mean it’s just a fucking website at the end of the day.
• A sigh of relief; I never liked it anyway.
• The Chinese government threaten to sanction the British because an official .cn blog design is being withheld and as a result is threatening the stability of the state. (just joking China, but, my my, you have a lot of blogs with the flowers design on it! )

The fifth I can actually deal with very soon because I will, in due course, no not yet, no… wait… no, wait a bit longer… ah ah ah! no stealing until I say go… sorry where was I… Oh yes, template, flowers, Creative Commons coming soon.

The other four I thought, fuck it, I don’t have to explain my actions. Not that the indifferent crowd are going to care anyway. And then I thought, that’s a really bad attitude to have towards the loyal few, so I fashioned an explanation, thus:

Let’s just say I got bored. I was feeling restricted. I fancied a change, even if that change is just the stylings of Expression Engine’s default install. Did I say Expression Engine? I surely did sir.

So there we have it now you understand completley and we’ll here no more of it. Maybe I can start enjoying writing again instead of wondering who has stolen my design or is making rude comments about my abilities as a designer.

Oh and I thought I might experiment with comments again… though be warned they might get deleted as I fumble my way through the Expression Engine learning curve.

More news on stuff and stuff soon… I’m off to shovel a whole big heap of link rot.